It would seem to be zombies crossed with Cloverfield, which just tickles me to no end.

Looks like Romero isn't the only one this year to tackle the undead with a handicam. Quarantine, due out on October 17th, released its first trailer today, and kids, the first look is fantastic. There's something tremendously effective about a handheld in a horror film. Between this and Diary of the Dead, this year is shaping up to make me one happy zombie fan.

Okay, so, one of the greatest dreams I ever had was of running into George Clooney at the Home Depot, and conversing with him such topics as digital photography and deep sea fishing. He was quite an amenable and pleasant sort, and it was a complete delight to shop with him for lumber. The dream was full of such ordinary awesome, that I kind of just got it into my head that that's what he's like in real life, and instantly cemented his position at number one on my list of Top Five People I Would Like to Have Over for Dinner.

Needless to say, when I saw this video, I was filled with such girlish delight that I bounced a little in my chair and clapped my hands with glee before watching it five and a half times in succession.

George Clooney, you are made of win, and I hope you get the statue on Sunday.

In case you've been in a wee cave and haven't heard the news, Romero's back. Trailer surfaced last month, but the resolution was craptacular, and you know how I feel about that. If it didn't happen in HD, well, it just didn't happen. Finally, a proper version is available.

While I desperately wished that Road of the Dead would have been his next project (and not just because I'm mad for Simon Baker), if not the long awaited King collaboration on A Buick 8, this will definitely tide me over.

That's right. I'm still here. I haven't fallen down any rabbit holes or been prey to any ravenous undead. You'll notice a few changes around the site.. Same pic, but much larger to accommodate some navigation along the right there, finally taking advantage of the new features in MT4.1. As always, if anything doesn't work in your browser, don't hesitate to let me know. New pictures, reviews, and zombie news coming soon. But for now, for those of you still out there, I offer just a little hello.

Oh, Resident Evil: Extinction. How much I wanted to like you. And you know, there were parts that I liked very much. However, as the sum of its parts, the film as a whole just didn't add up. The main problem? Not enough zombies! The set-up of the post-zombie-apocalypse created by the filmmakers held chilling promise that, unfortunately, never fully delivers. Early in the film, they exposit that, like its inhabitants, the world was dying, turning to a barren wasteland. When the camera pulls back from a small hut in the middle of nowhere to reveal nothing but sand and zombies as far as the eye can see, believe me, it is successful in instilling the intended sense of dread. And then that's about all you hear about it. The film is set in Vegas, already a desert, its landscape effectively unchanged. The journey of Claire Redfield's band of survivors would make for a compelling story as well. When we meet them, they're running dangerously low on both food and fuel (no mention of water of course, but we'll let that slide). Yet that, too, is stripped of its urgency by what the filmmakers would like us to believe is a more pressing matter.

You might be wondering, "What, pray tell, might that matter be?" Why, it's the nebulous evil machinations of the Umbrella Corporation, of course. Rather than focus on something simple and visceral like, say, survival, the film spends nearly half its time away from our heroes, deep in the bowels of some underground Umbrella compound. So jarring were these repeated departures, that it felt almost as if they were happening in some other (lower budget) film. And you know, I'm fine with evil corporations. Exaggerated reflections of the times in pop culture and all that tasty goodness. But the extent to which Umbrella was the focus of RE:E left the film feeling ill-paced to the point of almost slow.

That said, there were some good parts. Ali Larter, as Claire Redfield, provided a strong, human, counterpoint to Alice's superpowered heroine. And that superpowered heroine? Was cool as hell. Milla Jovovich was absolutely fierce, committing fully to a role that's taken some admittedly dubious turns over the course of the series, and lending a tenderness that manages to ground the over-the-top character. The scenes actually involving zombies (and/or their furry and feathered brethren) were exciting and well-done (if not, occasionally, done before), including one rather spectacular early scene with the zombie dogs that felt a bit out of place, but was awesome enough not to matter.

Is it worth seeing? Sure. But this is a safe wait for rental. If you're headed to the theaters, save your cash for a worthier venture like 3:10 to Yuma.

18:50 - I'll admit it. I panicked when I turned on FOX and found myself looking at football. As both boyfriend and A. will attest, there was swearing. There was some yelling. There was me hoping the Vikings would lose for having the gall to go into overtime when I'm trying to watch people walk down the red carpet in pretty dresses. But! The Vikings finally did lose (to the worst team in football, by the by), and the arrivals are finally gracing my screen in glorious, widescreen HD. I've got my beer, boyfriend is checking out delivery menus... everything's falling into place. The main event starts in ten minutes, folks, so stay tuned.

19:00 - Huh. I'm not sure how I feel about that stage. The set overall is looking kind of cheesy.

19:02 - Some day, awards shows will forgo tedious musical numbers. And it will be good.

19:04 - Conan's hair is particularly tall tonight...

19:05 - Eva Longoria really is spectacular, and those shoes are to die for. Ryan Seacrest, however, is still a douche.

19:07 - On the opposite end of that spectrum, however? Hugh Laurie. There is a man who can wear a tux.

19:08 - Yeah. This stage is awkward.

19:09 - Lost sound for the punchline of Ray Romano's joke. From the audience reaction, so did everyone else.

19:10 - me: durr... did you just lose sound?
A: only cause i hit mute

Exactly. Seriously. Is this guy still talking? Is this an awards show? What category are we even on?

19:12 - It is, I guess!

Supporting Actor (comedy): Jeremy Piven

Well, that was to be expected. And I do like him. I wish he'd brought a comb with him, but I do like him. He's kind of gotten foxy over the years, if a bit shiny tonight.

19:14 - Ugly my ass! I love that show, but hot damn, America Ferrara! Holy stunning! And how much do I love this category right now? I want everyone to win except for William Shatner, because he creeps me right the fuck out.

Supporting Actor (drama): TERRY O'QUINN! TERRY O'QUINN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

19:17 - But .. that is a really pink shirt. I mean, that is an astoundingly day-glo pink shirt. And again, with the shiny tie. What is up with the shiny ties? I like him better in shmutzy jungle gear.

19:22 - And Ryan Seacrest is talking again. I wish he would stop that. But that fabulous glimpse of Mary Louise Parker more than made up for it. Yowsa, with the crimson.

19:23 - Supporting Actress (comedy): Jamie Presley

Holy crap!!! That is absolutely fabulous. There were so many winning choices in this category (would have been equally happy with Elizabeth Perkins or Jenna Fisher), but I Presley was a gutsy nom in the first place, and the win is a dream, and she's so sweet and happy! Good for her.

19:26 - I thought it was Hei-gel. And wow.. could there be a more stunning pairing? I could eat either or both of them right up with a spoon.

Supporting Actor (miniseries): Who cares? Oh fine. Thomas Hayden Church.

19:28 - Could that stage be any more awkward? I hope they never do that again and whip pennies at whoever's dumb idea that was. Plus, I mean, is the theater not air conditioned? From how people look, it must be a thousand degrees.

19:35 - Food has arrived. I love you, dear readers, but right now, you are trumped by puu puu platter.

19:37 - Supporting Actress (drama): Katherine Heigl!!! Love her. Love the dress. Love the hair, the makeup, everything. Fully approve.

19:40 - Speaking of two shows I have no interest in watching... JLH is looking lovelier than usual though, so good for her.

19:41 - Colbert should win just for that montage. Okay, or maybe Conan, just for that nod. ;D

Best Writing (variety, comedy) - And Conan gets it, thumbs up!

19:45 - This is one hell of a puu puu platter, I tell you what.

19:51 - Is it wrong that I wish Tony Bennett was singing this song alone? Or that, again, they'd just forgo the damn musical numbers? If I wanted to see live music, I'd watch the VM.. er, nevermind.

19:52 - Oh good, Alec Baldwin. I'd like a Bloody Mary, please?

Best ... whatever category that was: The Tony Bennett thing. (Puu puu platter. Deal.)

19:55 - Lead Actor (miniseries): Robert Duvall! In a role I didn't see. But that's okay, I like him. And Ali Larter looks fantastic, although I like that colour better on MLP.

8:04 - When I was little, and I saw Roots, I was like "Whoa, it's that guy from Reading Rainbow!"

8:06 - I love Louis Gosset Jr. That is all.

8:07 - Outstanding Miniseries: Broken Trail. My radar. Off of it.

8:08 - Oh, c'mon. Let Robert Duvall finish his sentence. Cut Ryan Seacrest short, if you have to. I doubt anyone will complain.

8:09 - No shiny tie for Doogie, but some shiny, shiny lapels! Hayden Pannitiere is totally cutiepie though.

8:10 - Guest Actor & Actress (drama): ?? What happened here? I'm so confused.
Director (drama): Alan Taylor. (Peter Berg was robbed)
Writing (drama): David Chase. Snore.

8:20 - Steve Carrell! Steve Carrell!! (Stephen Colbert made a funny face :D) I love embittered JKras.

Variety, Music, or Comedy: Daily Show with John Stewart. And .. I mean, how do you make that call? How do you choose between Colbert and Stewart? I couldn't. Well, except for that Colbert has awesome ice cream, which gives him an edge.

Variety, Music, or Comedy Special: Tony Benn..zzzzzzz.. er. Sorry. You get the idea.

8:26 - (yeah, I switched computers and got off the militant time. Deal.) So, puu puu platter has been eaten. I have moved on to lemon chicken, and it is fabulous.

8:28 - Speaking of fabulous. Goddamn, Marcia Cross. Remember when she was Kimberly on Melrose Place and totally scary?

Best Actress, miniseries: someone in The Starter Wife, whatever.

8:33 - Was that Kate Fucking Walsh in a Cadillac commercial???

8:36 - MLP is seriously the hottest one there tonight.

8:37 - Miniseries - Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee. I'm sure it was excellent. I'll put it in my queue.

8:40 - Does anyone like musical numbers? I'm not being rhetorical here. I really want to know.

8:44 - TIM DALY!

8:45 - Sorry, I just really like Tim Daly.

8:46 - George Clooney really is transfixing.

8:49 - Also transfixing...Patrick Dempsy. Mmm... Dempsy...

Actress (miniseries): Helen Mirren. Because, well, duh. She was nominated. I didn't even watch that and I knew she would win. She is one foxy broad. And saucy too! LOVE. HER.

8:51 - Seriously. Normally, I'd be sick of the same person winning absolutely everything, but... she deserves it, and she's such a tremendous class act, while seeming to have fun and love every minute of it at the same time.. not too serious, not too blase, just perfectly fabulous.

8:53 - Louis Black, I mean, he makes a point, but he sounds constipated all the time. I just can't abide.

20:58 - More crimson. I love it!

Writing & Directing (miniseries) - Prime Suspect folk. Again, I'll add it to my queue.

21:04 - Masi Oka! Masi Oka! MASI FUCKING OKA! How cute is he with his little apple?

21:08 - Two people from shows I don't watch. Or maybe the same show. I can't keep track. Teehee.. I think I like that lady though. She's sassy.

21:09 - Individual Performance in a Variety, Comedy, Musical, etc.: Tony Bzzzzzzzzzz..... ...

21:12 - Guest Actor & Actress (comedy): And that's how I missed it last time, I guess. What an odd presentation. Stanley Tucci and some lady. Well, okay then. I love when batty old ladies get the mic at awards shows. Remember Liz Taylor and the Gladiator debacle? That was great.

21:13 - Directing (comedy): Richard Shepherd, Ugly Betty. And you know, I believe it too. That's another one, where it's like, how do you decide? It was a damn good year for comedies, and I just can't argue with this one at all, as much as I loved the rest of the nominees.

21:16 - Writing (comedy): Greg Daniels, The Office, "Gay Witch Hunt." Again, how do you choose? Love it.

21:21 - This is kind of the point of the program where I really start fading. I know they front load with the big supporting awards so that people have something they care about right away, but then there's like an hour of anticlimax, to where when we finally reach categories I've been really following (like the two preceding ones), I'm kind of just spacing out.

21:24 - Note to Ryan Seacrest: no.

21:25 - At first, I was like, who the hell is this guy? But.. now I kind of like him. Especially because he just said the words "Rainn Wilson."

21:27 - Don't Forget the Lyrics: Celebrity Edition should totally be on FOX's '09 fall schedule.

21:29 - Seriously, does anything have a shot against Amazing Race?

Competitive Reality Apparently not. Excellent. Hi, Phil! I love you, Phil!

21:31 - John Moffet... wasn't he a head in a jar in Silence of the Lambs? You've come a long way, baby.

21:35 - I was just thinking how I couldn't love anything more than the glory that is Tina Fey, but then they put up this big, screen-filling image of Wentworth Miller.

21:36 - And while we're talking about gorgeous men, I give you Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart.

21:37 - Oh man! I want a private jet sandwich! I want to meander around three different cabins! That's how I want to roll!

21:39 - Lead actor (comedy): Ricky Gervais. And you know, you just can't argue with that logic.

21:40 - Sweet Jesus. How can an old man like Hugh Laurie be so hot?

21:41 - Lead Actress (drama) - Sally Field. They like her! They really like her!

21:42 - I've never watched Brothers & Sisters. Isn't it about Republicans or something? (I do kind of love Sally Field though. How can anyone not? Remember when she was someone's crazy mom on ER?)

21:44 - Okay, even I can't joke through the "In Memorium"... these things choke me up without fail.

21:52 - Oh, Debra Messing. Ned & Stacy was cut short in its prime.

21:53 - Lead Actress (comedy): America Ferrara. And, you know, okay, I love her. I love that show. But Mary Louise Parker was just robbed. And it's nothing against America at all (that sounds weird to say, by the way), she's young, and she's very good for as young as she is, but from the perspective of sheer acting ability, there's just no comparison. Still, can't argue with it too much, because at that level, it's just different stages of comedy.

21:55 - Kate Walsh, gorgeous in crimson, but the makeup and hair is a little severe. No favors being done there.

21:55 - Best Actor (drama): James Spader. Really? I mean... Really? Really? Okay, I guess? Even he doesn't seem totally sure about the whole thing.

22:01 - Secret confession: Whenever they say "Sona" on Prison Break, I always sing a little bit of The Strokes' song "Soma" in my head.

22:02 - Comedy Series: 30 ROCK! 30 ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!! In my wildest dreams!!!!!!!! Wow. If you aren't one of the aforementioned dozens and dozens of viewers, get with it. It's that funny.

22:08 - Can I have one last wow for Helen Mirren?

22:09 - The Sopranos. Which.. it was to be expected, and don't get me started. Maybe next year, Tim Kring!

22:10 - Wow, holy bitchface, Katie Heigl. She wasn't even pretending and I secretly kind of love her for that. Because, seriously. I loved The Sopranos very much, for very much of the time, but the final season, the one that just received the award, was not part of that time. It's getting this as a series reward, not for this year's merits, and I find that tremendously obnoxious, as did the lovely Miss Heigl, apparently.

22:12 - Well, it's over. And... I feel oddly satisfied. There were a lot of surprises, and a lot of really pleasant ones at that. It wasn't the liveliest of awards shows, and the set was vile, but the people were pleasant, and the wins were pretty solid, overall. I thank you for watching with me, and/or reading after the fact. I bid you all a pleasant evening, and a good tomorrow.

You don't have to know me for very long to realize two things about me: I love Stephen King, and I love John Cusack. "1408," from 2002's Everything's Eventual, ranks among my favourites of the King's short fiction. Needless to say, and as you may recall, I was tremendously excited for the film version. A welcome tide-me-over to Frank Darabont's release of my ultimate favourite of King's short work, "The Mist."

I saw Mikael Håfström's 1408 opening night, and couldn't have been more disappointed. Part of me wasn't surprised. His Derailed was, if you'll pardon the pun, a train wreck. However, where I took exception with Derailed for being too ugly, my complaint with 1408 is that it wasn't ugly enough. I held off reviewing until I could re-read the book, hoping, perhaps, that I'd mythologized in my own mind the impact of the short. I hadn't, unfortunately. But one of my pet peeves in reviewing is endless comparison of book-to-movie, because the latter is almost never as good, and because chances are, a good chunk of the audience have never read the book in the first place, rendering most of the reviewers positives or negatives completely moot in the eyes of the reader.

So, excluding the influence (or lack thereof) of the story, 1408 was decent. John Cusack was good, definitely capable of carrying just about the whole movie by his lonesome. His rendition of Mike Enslin was the closest the film came to delivering on the promise of the short story. Cusack convincingly makes Enslin likable, with just a touch of the abrasive required. His descent into the horrors of the room sell otherwise dubious scenes, and he remains the film's saving grace.

The horrors themselves, however, leave something to be desired. There are some good scares, but there are far more that fall flat, a problem that is made worse by pacing that too frequently felt awkward at best, and downright slow at worst. The special effects are passable, but feel like a stylistic step backwards in comparison to other recent horror films, and even, to Håfström's earlier work.

To be fair, I must add that boyfriend liked it a great deal. He hadn't read the original story, went into the film without expectations, and came out satisfied.

Do I think it's worth seeing? Yes. Cusack's performance alone is worth the price of admission. I intend to see it again myself, hopefully leaving the comparisons behind to enjoy it as a stand-alone piece. But it isn't a must-see, and a person could very safely easily wait for rental or cable.

Now, for those looking for details... (and warning, if you click through, there be spoilers)

And is it wrong that I just got chills?

The teaser for I Am Legend is out, and it is that good.

That said, it is a long way off, so give yourself a treat and read the original work by Richard Matheson first. Something tells me it's going to make for a very interesting comparison.

A movie like Hostel II tends towards the difficult when it comes to reviews. On the one hand, it's completely review-proof, in that the people who want to see it, your genre fans/Roth fans/etc., will see it no matter what. If anything, a bad review would serve as incentive; the means by which to be further contrary. And yet, for someone unsure what to expect, the very surprises that might sell them on it would be partially diminished in their revelation.

I won't do that. Even behind a cut, because they are simply to delicious to risk. If I'm vague, this is why. Do not take said vagueness for apathy, however, because Hostel II is a spectacular example of how to do this genre right. It slides easily into the top five horror films of the last five years, far surpassing even its predecessor in quality.

Among my few complaints regarding the elder Hostel was the fact that there was really no emotional connection. Beneath the stylish film making, it was basically three chuckleheads who died in interesting ways. While the principles in Hostel II certainly have flashes of carelessness, Roth allows them the time to be more than that. To be strong, and intelligent, and loyal to each other. To fight the "ugly American" sentiment that all of the first film's primaries embodied (while reinforcing it in an all together different manner). That extra bit of time with the characters takes the film from a well-done splatterfest into the realm of true suspense. Instead of ugly things happening to ugly Americans, you get three women that could be anyone you knew in college. Even your best friend. You care what happens to them.

One surprise that I can mention without risk of spoilers is the level of gore. There's interesting little of it. While what there is of it is definitely disturbing and grotesque, much of it is off-screen, lending the "money shots" that much more oomph. And if we're talking body count? I'm pretty sure just the trailer for Live Free or Die Hard has it beat. Eli Roth lets your imagination do the heavy lifting for most of the film, offering but glimpses at the horror that lies beneath idyllic towns and best laid plans, right up until the jaw-dropping final sequences.

At 96 minutes, Hostel II is concise and well-paced in its storytelling and scares. The acting/casting and writing were both an improvement on the first film, and the cinematography was gorgeous, enough to make a person want to book a trip to the eastern block, even after a film that should have the exact opposite reaction.

I can't recommend it without reservation just because of the nature of the film. While it's smarter, better executed, and far easier to stomach than a lot of its ilk (Aja, I'm looking at you), it is still what it is. Being more subtle than Saw II does not make it a picnic on top of Marshmallow Mountain. But for horror aficionados? Hostel II is an absolute triumph. I loved it.

(P.S.: The trailer for 30 Days of Night was worth the price of admission alone.)

L.A. Times catches up with Eli Roth, proclaiming him a queasy-does-it guy.

I secretly loved Hostel. There was no story to it whatsoever, the acting was adequate at best, and downright poor at its worst, it was completely and totally gross, and I loved it. There was style to it. I dare say, even art, that elevated it beyond the works of many of his fellow "Masters of Horror" (excepting, of course, Neil Marshall, who will always be my favourite. I love you, Neil Marshall! Read my script!). I would wager almost that my very first "complaint," its lack of story, is almost what made it more successful than films like Saw or The Hills Have Eyes, where the style is inevitably pushed to the side under the crushing weight of the plot's preposterousness, a mad dash to tie up loose ends that no one cares about. Hostel, on the other hand, was just an unapologetic onslaught of gore that almost winds up feeling, well, cleaner.

In the article, Roth states, "I want people to be scared and walk away upset, but I don't want them to feel like they need to take a shower." It's that mentality that will cement his future in Hollywood; the acknowledgment of that line. I was already pumped for his take on Cell, but after reading Roth's interview, I'm downright floating. It's been a long time since we've had a proper King adaptation that didn't come from Frank Darabont (seriously, Lawrence Kasdan, why did you do that terrible thing to Dreamcatcher?)

The final test, of course, will be whether or not lightning will strike twice. Luckily, Hostel II comes out this weekend, so I won't have long to wait.

The year of the zombie continues on a high note with last weekend's release of 28 Weeks Later.

I think it's impossible to talk about any sequel without comparison to the original, and in that vein, I do have to report that 28 Weeks Later isn't as good as its predecessor. Days was a visceral, stunning piece of filmmaking, while Weeks feels (understandably) more derivative. It is strongest in its opening moments (moments that, I suspect, belonged to Danny Boyle's second unit directing work, rather than Fresdanillo himself), but remains a solid film throughout, highlighted by several truly haunting and beautiful moments that elevate it above its summer blockbuster counterparts.

Robert Carlyle is fantastic as ever, definitely having fun with the role, throwing himself into it with unabashed glee. Early in the film, he is forced to recount the horrifying opening moments to his children, and the camera lingers on his face as he speaks, his agonized intonation harkening back to his stellar work in Ravenous.

Rose Byrne, Jeremy Renner, and the children Mackintosh Muggleton (greatest name ever, btw) and Imogen Poots falter somewhat in Carlyle's tremendous shadow, but still to a very fine job in depicting a survivor's role in a world gone mad. The quartet is believable and well-acted, and do their best to bring life to their characters in the short spans allowed between action sequences.

The action sequences themselves are well-paced (and frenetically so), and full of tension. Not for the squeamish, 28 Weeks Later ups the gore factor considerably. I won't ruin the surprise by identifying them, but when Fresdanillo gets it right, he really gets it right.

(Note: Spoilers below the cut. Proceed with caution.)

Holy out-of-the-blue-spinoffs, Batman!

Uh, yeah. Heroes: Origins, coming up out of nowhere. Check it out.

The other big news: longer seasons. Where ABC's Lost is dropping its final three seasons to 16 eps a piece, NBC is taking the opposite turn, ordering 30 for The Office, 25 for My Name Is Earl, with Heroes coming in for 24 (30, if'n you're counting the Origins run). Fingers crossed that this is indicative of a trend.

P.S.: Friday Night Lights is moving to Fridays. ;)